May
30
Gina T
I have had so many people ask to borrow money in the last 2 years, and if I give it I go without. I don’t want to lose a friend, so what’s the best way to just say no?
I have had so many people ask to borrow money in the last 2 years, and if I give it I go without. I don’t want to lose a friend, so what’s the best way to just say no?
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13 Responses to “How do I say no when someone asks to borrow money?”
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say i only have enough moeny for me to get this so i’m sorry maybe next time if i have extra.
Say you are tight on money too and just barely able to budget for all your needs. Sorry – you can’t spare it.
If they were really your friend they would understand. Just tell them if you give them money you will be going without so how is it fair it is your money but so they don’t go without you give it to them putting you in their situation. If they are your friend they will understand and still be your friend. I have never asked my friends to borrow money and they have never asked me no matter how bad we were hurting for money.
Just tell them no, they’re probably not really you’re friend if they just come to you when they need money. It’s not like you’ll have it on you ALL the time.
Just tell them how you feel, if they ask why. Unless they’re insensitive, just tell them you’re broke.
“I only lend money on the condition of getting very good collateral. That way, if something should happen and you can’t repay on time, I can sell the collateral and we can still be friends.” Then demand that they leave you with something that can be easily pawned for the value of the loan.
You shouldn’t loose a friend if you say no about loaning money out. If you do, that wasn’t much of a friend to begin with. Just tell him/her that you don’t have the money to loan.
all of the answers here are good.
When my kids were in highschool and their friends would ask to borrow money they would loan them a couple of bucks. When they would ask again for more money, my kids would remember and say “when you pay me back the money you already owe me”. That was the end of that.
I’m not sure how good of friends are asking, and their age, and how much they want. To me those answers would determine what I do. BUT you could just have a policy of “no” to anyone and everyone. It’s your choice.
Tell them that you just don’t have it to spare right now.
Only give money if you are prepared to never see it again and are ok with that. IF someone Pays it back then it is a surprise. I think you should say no to friends but save only for family and one close friend. Keep in mind loaning money can ruin relationships.
You can say “I’m sorry, I am not able to at this time”, then maybe do something that can help them get what they need. For example, if they are really in need and can’t buy groceries, take them to the local Food Bank. If they want to buy some clothes, point them toward the thrift store.
You say:
“No, I’m sorry I can’t help you.”
If they ask “why” do the “broken record routine”.
“Why does the reason matter”, Would your knowing help you in any way? I’m sorry I don’t feel comfortable talking about my personal finances. Just repeat the same things.
You do NOT owe anyone an explanation. Whether they are a acquaintance or a loved one = it doesn’t matter. You are not hurting them by saying no. You are being honest. You do not need to defend yourself or make excuses.
A kind but firm “no” is as easy or as hard as you make it.
If they respect you = they will accept your reply.
If they DON’T respect you = there is NOTHING you can do to satisfy them, so don’t try.
If a friend blows you off because you didn’t give them money, they are not a friend and you should be glad to be rid of them. Seriously. The surest way to damage a friendship is to actually give the money. Debts between friends are more damaging than anything else, including refusing the loan or gift in the first place.
The next time someone asks you for money simply say you’re not comfortable with it because of what it might do to your friendship. That does seem to be your first concern. Beyond that, say you’ve had to tighten your belt, too, and you’ve very sorry that you’re unable to help.
I’m sorry, I’m strapped for cash now too …
and then maybe ramble on about how you just spend X amount getting your car fixed, or at the vet, or school books – whatever.
If it’s obvious that you have the money …
tell them; I’m sorry I’m not comfortable lending out money …
tell them you are broke too, and the offer to help each other make a monthly budget.